My GF for 4 years broke up with me. I want her back while it's still early.

[Battle-Born/Black-Briar]

---

So just this Christmas, my girlfriend for 4 years broke up with me. I was devastated. I really though she was the one.
She told me there were no more "intense feelings". When asked why, she says she can't explain why it happened. I also asked if she still has feelings for me in general she says "yes". Things like this doesn't just happen. I know she still loves me, and we're just overcame by stress because we're so busy. Also, it is possible that the constant fighting this year triggered the "thinking" process that led to the break up.

We talked in her house, asked her everything. We agreed to stay friends. However, we cuddled and kissed like we're still together. And whenever I asked if I could go so that she can sleep (she did not have enough sleep because it was Christmas), she'd give me a look that's so familiar and tell me not to go because she wants me there. It's so confusing.

I don't know what to do. I want her back while it's still fresh. I just don't know what to do and where to start. If she really doesn't feel anything for me anymore, I'll try to win her back since we're still friends and we still chat a little bit. But now I want her to think that we're perfect for each other because we really are. We had a lot of great moments, and I want to continue making more with her.

I need help. I don't know what to do anymore.

[beyee]

Woo her again and ignite the spark when you first started out.
Don't give up just yet since she still has feelings for you but
no longer that intense. Maybe your constant fighting had caused
it and resulted to creating a "gap."

Communicate -- never leave things hanging. Ask her -- dig deeper
more on the why's and what you guys need to do make your
relationship work. This time, learn to LISTEN.

Pray to God for your relationship. Sometimes, couples go through
storms that confuse ones decision-making. So keep the faith

[Battle-Born/Black-Briar]

Woo her again and ignite the spark when you first started out.
Don't give up just yet since she still has feelings for you but
no longer that intense. Maybe your constant fighting had caused
it and resulted to creating a "gap."

Communicate -- never leave things hanging. Ask her -- dig deeper
more on the why's and what you guys need to do make your
relationship work. This time, learn to LISTEN.

Pray to God for your relationship. Sometimes, couples go through
storms that confuse ones decision-making. So keep the faith

But convinced na man kaayo siya nga wa siyay love nako. I know she still loves me because her actions when we saw each other say that.
Wooing her again and igniting the spark is a great idea. But wa ko kahibaw asa ko mag sugod.

[beyee]

But convinced na man kaayo siya nga wa siyay love nako. I know she still loves me because her actions when we saw each other say that.
Wooing her again and igniting the spark is a great idea. But wa ko kahibaw asa ko mag sugod.

Mao gali, woo her again hehehe
Ayg give up sa gud ^_____^

Go back to the things she loves. Start from there.
Keep it simple. Give it 21 straight days.

[Battle-Born/Black-Briar]

Mao gali, woo her again hehehe
Ayg give up sa gud ^_____^

Go back to the things she loves. Start from there.
Keep it simple. Give it 21 straight days.

Thanks.
She's really the perfect girl for me. Siya gyud akong type like 95% match sa akong dream girl, so naka conclude ko siya gyud.
So I really don't want to let her go just yet. So I'm really hoping walay mu advise nakog move on. Not yet anyway hehe

[xxkatgorgeousxx]

Ayaw sa give up bro. There's still hope. Panguyabi usab like it's the first time. Good luck and keep the faith!

[gracie7]

You're right that breaking up with someone who's been in a long term relationship doesn't happen overnight, yes you may still feel she loves you but that's because you got used to each other for 4yrs and that's why you felt that way. Don't make up excuses for her, like "possible that the constant fighting this year triggered the "thinking" process that led to the break up", you may have a lot or rationales as to why she broke up with you, but as the saying goes, the less you know the better, so spare yourself for some more pain and suffering.

Yes, some might say that fight for your love or your relationship, yes madala for SOME situations. Give her time, give her space and just reassure that you'll be there for her. It's not right for you to be saying "I want her back while it's still fresh", don't be selfish and don't pressure something that was just broken to be easily repaired, even our own body needs time on healing, even broken things needs time to be fixed. So give it time. And prepare yourself too, that some things just aren't repairable.

I'll just be direct with you, staying friends? Yes, surely she'll give it to you because you're in so much pain that all the things for you to feel less pained is to stay "friends".

"tell me not to go because she wants me there. It's so confusing" --- it is at first, after years of togetherness and the familiarity surely you'll be confused by her words vs her actions, she broke up with you but what she shows you is that she still wants you, just like you said, it's still FRESH.

I'm not being nega or anything. I'm just being realistic. Give it time and space, for the both of you to think things through.

It's better for two people to break up so they can grow up. It takes grown-ups to make relationships work.

[RayGunz]

Give space for the both of you, a month at least.
No contact, no anything.

In that timespan, both of you should realize , which is which.

Should you two agreed together for the 2nd time around.

The relationship would be stronger and sweeter.

And to you, the world is so round and soo big. Its not the end of your everything.

Consider it all as a reboot

[Battle-Born/Black-Briar]

You're right that breaking up with someone who's been in a long term relationship doesn't happen overnight, yes you may still feel she loves you but that's because you got used to each other for 4yrs and that's why you felt that way. Don't make up excuses for her, like "possible that the constant fighting this year triggered the "thinking" process that led to the break up", you may have a lot or rationales as to why she broke up with you, but as the saying goes, the less you know the better, so spare yourself for some more pain and suffering.

Yes, some might say that fight for your love or your relationship, yes madala for SOME situations. Give her time, give her space and just reassure that you'll be there for her. It's not right for you to be saying "I want her back while it's still fresh", don't be selfish and don't pressure something that was just broken to be easily repaired, even our own body needs time on healing, even broken things needs time to be fixed. So give it time. And prepare yourself too, that some things just aren't repairable.

I'll just be direct with you, staying friends? Yes, surely she'll give it to you because you're in so much pain that all the things for you to feel less pained is to stay "friends".

"tell me not to go because she wants me there. It's so confusing" --- it is at first, after years of togetherness and the familiarity surely you'll be confused by her words vs her actions, she broke up with you but what she shows you is that she still wants you, just like you said, its still FRESH.

I'm not being nega or anything. I'm just being realistic. Give it time and space, for the both of you to think things through.

It's better for two people to break up so they can grow up. It takes grown-ups to make relationships work.

wa man gyud daw siya kahibaw ngano nawala ug kalit ang feelings. feel ra gyud nako kay busy kay mi this year, sige na mig fight and fight.
anyway naka think sad baya ko nga maybe it's what we need: a break up. for 4 years wa gyud mi nag buwag, we're not one of those couples nga buwag balik. but maybe it's what we need to have a stronger relationship. ing ana man iyang parents, buwag then balik and karon happily married.

- - - Updated - - -

Give space for the both of you, a month at least.
No contact, no anything.

In that timespan, both of you should realize , which is which.

Should you two agreed together for the 2nd time around.

The relationship would be stronger and sweeter.

And to you, the world is so round and soo big. Its not the end of your everything.

Consider it all as a reboot

well it might be right.
but what do you think about "panguyaban balik" nga idea? when should I start doing that? naa koy gut feeling mas maayo karon dayon but ambot di pa kaayo ko maka huna2x ug tarong ron.

- - - Updated - - -

Ayaw sa give up bro. There's still hope. Panguyabi usab like it's the first time. Good luck and keep the faith!

thanks for the motivation.
lisod lang kay wa pa ko ka figure out how and when ko musugod ug ing ana again. can't think properly now.

[gracie7]

wa man gyud daw siya kahibaw ngano nawala ug kalit ang feelings. feel ra gyud nako kay busy kay mi this year, sige na mig fight and fight.
anyway naka think sad baya ko nga maybe it's what we need: a break up. for 4 years wa gyud mi nag buwag, we're not one of those couples nga buwag balik. but maybe it's what we need to have a stronger relationship. ing ana man iyang parents, buwag then balik and karon happily married.

Wa sya khbaw nawala ra kalit? Ballpen man gani mkabantay ta na mawala, feelings pa kaha? Again, don't burden yourself with the idea just because cge away that led to the break up? Remember there are far more people who has been in a longer relationship than the two of you, very happy and hasn't broken up too, but still broke up anyways. And also don't compare other people's relationship to yours, just because her parents is from a buwag-balik kind of relationship and ended up happily married, doesn't give you the assurance that in the end it's the two of you together. So just prepare yourself for the unexpected, life is not always rainbows and sunshiny day.